This stage is about laying the groundwork for a smooth and stress-free transition to stopping wearing nappies. At this stage, you’re helping your child build awareness of their body, bladder, and bowel habits.

• Check there is no underlying constipation. 1 in 3 children in the UK have symptoms of constipation and it can be hard to spot in children as it presents different to adults. If you’re not sure, it’s worth ruling out before stopping nappies. You can check for signs of constipation here.
• Offer regular water-based drinks. Good hydration helps the bladder fill and empty properly, building its strength and keeping poo soft and comfortable to pass.
• Talk positively and naturally about wee and poo. Explain what is happening during nappy changes: “Your nappy is wet because you’ve done a wee” or “Your poo is ready to go into the toilet.” Avoid describing poo as dirty, disgusting or naughty. as it’s a completely natural bodily function.
• Change nappies when they are wet or soiled. This helps them begin to connect what their body has done with what they can feel in their nappy and starts to build connection and familiarity, it also teaches your child to accommodate interruptions for toileting, which is important as they get closer to stopping using nappies.

The practice stage is about building confidence and independence with potty skills. Once your child can safely sit up on their own, you can start helping them use the potty at key times.

As they grow and develop, you can help them start to learn to recognise their body’s signals, and practice simple skills like dressing and undressing, using words or signs to communicate, and developing good hygiene habits. This stage helps them feel comfortable with the process before fully transitioning out of nappies.

• Introduce a potty once your child can sit safely. Offer a short, relaxed sit at predictable times, such as after waking, after a meal or when you think a poo may be coming. Offering at these times makes it more likely your child will do a wee or a poo. This helps doing a wee or poo over a hole something familiar and help your child understand what the potty is for.
• Make sure your child feels physically secure. Choose a stable potty that allows their feet to rest on the floor. If they prefer the toilet, use a child’s toilet seat and a sturdy step so that their feet are supported and their knees are slightly higher than their hips.
• Let your child see how the toilet is used. If you are comfortable doing so, explain what you are doing when you use the toilet. Children learn a great deal through watching and copying the people around them.
• Use books and play. Help a teddy or doll use the potty, practise pushing trousers down and act out the whole routine together. Stories and pretend play allow children to understand what is expected without feeling under pressure.
• Practise the other skills too. Choose easy-to-manage clothing and help your child learn to dress and undress, wipe, flush and wash their hands.
• Praise your child’s effort and developing skills, rather than only praising a successful wee or poo. Simple comments such as “You noticed your wee,” “You sat and tried,” or “You pushed your pants down by yourself” help them recognise their own progress.
• Keep potty sits short and relaxed. Stay nearby, sing a song, chat or read a short book. Never force your child to sit or keep them there when they are distressed.

Offer short nappy-free periods (up to half an hour), just after they have done a wee or poo, to help them feel confident to go nappy free.

This final step is about transitioning away from nappies completely. Whatever stage your child is on their potty learning journey, stopping using nappies is a big change for them.

Before stopping nappies, try to choose a reasonably calm period when:

• your child is well and any constipation has been addressed;
• they have had opportunities to practise using the potty or toilet;
• you can allow extra time and attention for learning; and
• there are not too many other major changes happening at once.

Most well-prepared children can move directly into pants. However, if your child seems frightened of the potty, strongly attached to their nappy or will only poo in a nappy, suddenly removing it may increase anxiety or withholding. In this situation, a gradual, step-by-step approach may be better than a quick ‘ditch nappies and go for it’ approach.

You can find out more about the Little Steps method via Spotify or in Rebecca’s book Positively Potty.

Once your child stops wearing nappies:

1. Use simple, easy-to-remove clothing. Joggers, leggings, skirts/dresses or loose trousers are much easier to manage quickly than tights, buttons, belts or dungarees.
2. Build potty visits into the daily routine. Help your child try after waking, after meals, before leaving the house, before naps and whenever you notice their usual signals. They may not yet be able to recognise the need or tell you in time, so they will need your help at first.
3. Treat accidents as part of learning. Stay calm and use neutral language: “Your wee came out before we reached the potty. Let’s get you clean and dry.” Avoid disappointment, punishment or shame.
4. Gradually reduce your help. As your child becomes more aware and confident, give them more opportunities to notice their body and initiate the toilet visit themselves. Avoid repeatedly asking, “Do you need a wee?” as this can become stressful and is easy for a busy child to ignore.

You do not need to stay at home throughout potty training. Outings provide important opportunities for your child to practise using different toilets.

Preparation and practice can begin long before your child stops wearing nappies. You do not need to wait until they ask to use the potty, show a particular level of interest or remain dry for two hours.

It might interest you to know that before disposable nappies were the norm, 60% of English babies started potty learning within the first 2 weeks of life, 47% had completed potty training by 12 months and 83% were finished by 18 months. (Douglas & Blomfield, Children Under 5, 1958).

There is no single “readiness” test. Signs such as noticing a wet nappy, pausing before a poo or beginning to communicate about their body are useful clues about the support your child needs, but they are not requirements that must all be achieved before learning begins.

Experts now recommend that, for most children, the move away from daytime nappies should happen between 18 and 30 months because research shows this is best for their developing bladder and bowel health. This is a broad window rather than a deadline: children are unique and some will need more time, preparation or tailored support.

Children with delayed speech, autism, physical differences or other additional needs may need adapted equipment, visual prompts or more help with individual skills. They should still be given regular opportunities to learn and practise.

When you go out you may need a portable toilet so they can use it. Choose to spend time at a park with toddler toilets, such as Coram’s Fields, or a drop-in with small toilets so that your child will see ‘big’ boys and ‘big’ girls going to the loo.

You may also find it helpful to take:

• several changes of clothes;
• a wet bag for damp clothing;
• wipes and hand-cleaning supplies; and
• a washable absorbent liner for the buggy or car seat.

Encourage your child to try before leaving home and show them where the toilet is when you arrive somewhere new. Child-sized toilets can be helpful, but children also need opportunities to become confident using ordinary toilets with suitable support.

Talk to nursery, grandparents and other caregivers so that everyone uses similar language and follows the same general routine.

The main goal of night-time potty training is to teach your child to wake to the sensation of a full bladder and use the potty or toilet as required.

The key factor in being dry at night is habit, and this is something you can teach your child. Just like when you teach your child to learn potty skills for the daytime, you can start teaching your child the skills they will need to be independent from nappies at night as you go along. Whenever you decide to stop using nappies, it is always a good idea to help your child get into good night-time habits.

Whether you stop using nappies in the day and at night at the same time or separately is up to you. Most of the skills your child will need to get into good habits and stay dry at night are things you can start teaching before you stop using nappies.

Once children have mastered daytime potty training, most children will start staying dry at night within around 6 months. Around this time is a good time to give stopping wearing nappies at night a go.

Top tips for night time:

• Encourage regular drinks throughout the day so that you can safely reduce fluids 1-2 hours before bedtime.
• Do not routinely lift a sleeping child onto the toilet, as this does not help them learn to wake to a full bladder.
• Protect the sleep space with good mattress protection and keep spare pyjamas nearby and ready in case of night time wetting.
• Use a potty in the room at bedtime and when they wake up in the morning, to help them build the habit. Do the wee as a last thing before settling to sleep.
• Respond to any accidents straight away as soon as you know about it. This teaches your child that their body’s signals are worth listening to, so it’s important not to just pretend the accident never happened.

If they wake up in the night having wet the bed, encourage your child to sit on the potty and see if they’ve got any more wee to do. Sometimes they will have started weeing in the bed and it will have woken them up but then they’ll finish their wee on the potty. Thank your child for sitting on the potty and/or weeing in the potty.

Remember, a few accidents in the first few weeks and months is completely normal. However, if your child is regularly wetting at night, or if you notice anything on the list below, speak to your school nurse or GP. Bedwetting is not the child’s fault, and effective assessment and treatment are available. Here’s what to watch out for:

• Wet every single night for more than a week.
• Wet more than once a week for more than 6 months.
• Regularly wets more than once a night.
• Your child is aged 4 or above and has never been dry at night.
• Your child was previously dry at night.
• Your child has any other symptoms such as increased thirst, weight loss, fatigue, irritability or changes in behaviour, or any other unexplained health symptoms.
• Bed wetting is causing you or your child distress.

Accidents and setbacks are a normal part of learning. If progress has stopped, try to work out which part of the process is difficult rather than assuming your child is simply “not ready”.

Consider whether your child:

• is constipated or withholding poo;
• is frightened or uncomfortable using the potty or toilet;
• finds the bathroom noisy, unfamiliar or overwhelming;
• needs more help recognising their body signals;
• is being prompted so often that they have begun to resist;
• finds their clothing difficult to manage; or
• is coping with illness, tiredness or a major change in routine.

If your child is becoming very distressed, withholding wee or poo, or developing painful bowel movements, pause and address the underlying problem. You can temporarily return to the preparation and practice stages, but continue helping them build skills rather than waiting passively for them to become interested.

This is not our area of expertise but these organisations offer excellent information on dealing with bedwetting, day-time wetting, constipation and soiling:

• ERIC
• Bladder & Bowel UK is also a useful resource for helping early years settings and schools manage continence. They also have bladder and bowel information for Children and Young People. Helpline: 0161 214 4591.